Family Counseling – Signs Of Toxic Sibling Relationship

A toxic sibling relationship is one of most family issues that get overlooked. No one considers it a dysfunctional family dynamic as everyone believes it to be normal and manageable. However, not everyone knows that a toxic sibling relationship can be detrimental to one’s emotional well-being and mental health. It is entirely difficult to determine whether the siblings are just fond of being playful or genuinely manipulative and somewhat abusive. Fortunately, there are signs that families can use as their guidelines.

Taking All The Advantage

Every family relationship deals with unfairness and inequality. Sadly, people will immediately notice a toxic sibling relationship when one always gets what he wants while the other endures giving in all the time. These toxic siblings always expect to be saved regardless of the consequences of their actions. They require their other sibling to take the fall whenever they did something wrong. Though some people might see this as a heroic act, it is genuinely damaging to the victim’s mental and emotional health. And the fact that a person’s siblings don’t care about his life is considered abusive and immature.

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Disrespecting Personal Boundaries

There is a huge misconception when someone asks for personal space, especially when it involves a family relationship. It is considered a selfish act for wanting to be isolated or separated from people in the house. Some may think of it as unnecessary since family members should spend time with each other often. But it is essential to note that toxic sibling relationships start with disrespecting personal boundaries. Usually, toxic siblings will feel so entitled to make the other one’s rights feel less important. Therefore, they wouldn’t care if they disrespect or invade someone else personal space.

Making Others Feel Anxious

Toxic siblings usually have unpredictable behaviors that can make their brother or sister anxious. Even the thought of seeing them or getting an inch near them makes the person want to run and hide. This particular feeling of avoiding toxic siblings can ruin the person’s life as the victim continues to avoid situations involving these individuals. Other family members might notice the person’s uncomfortable feeling when there’s a consistent attempt to avoid family gatherings. There is an obvious dreadful aura that makes the person always feel on edge around the toxic siblings.

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Manipulating Behaviors 

Toxic individuals are very good at manipulating others mentally and emotionally. But it tends to get worse when those individuals happen to be part of the family. Since they know too much information about their brother or sister, these toxic siblings may use those important data to control the victim whenever they want. In some instances, even if toxic siblings know their brother or sister’s greatest fear and insecurities, they wouldn’t care as long as they can use those negative attributes to their advantage. In worse cases, these toxic people would take control over something important so that the victim can give in and depend more on them.

Too Exhausting To Be Around

One of the worst things in a toxic sibling relationship is the victim getting mental and emotional issues due to the siblings always being around. It makes the person lose interest in life because of the siblings’ demand to only listen to them and comply with their wants and needs. These toxic people will dump all the negativity onto the victim, leaving nothing but trauma, heartache, stress, and discomfort. In addition, toxic siblings are exhausting to spend time with because they will use the victim’s inabilities to cope with their imperfections.

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Having Unhealthy Rivalry 

There is a serious toxic sibling relationship in the family when children tend to fight over their worth. Yes, rivalry can be a great thing, especially if it can contribute to everyone’s overall development. However, if it gets to used only to outshine the other person, that can be detrimental to one’s psychological and emotional health. Toxic siblings will focus only on a limited amount of success or achievement and often get accompanied by psychological stress and physical aggression. In addition, toxic siblings negatively acting on this unhealthy rivalry may desire more favors and entitlement from the other siblings.

Not Wanting To Be Around

One of the worst toxic sibling relationships that one can experience is being betrayed or left alone by the people who are supposed to be there in times of need. Often, manipulative and toxic siblings would only care about themselves and use their brother or sister to their advantage. But family members would know that there’s a dysfunction in the unit once the toxic ones do not want anything to do with their sibling. These individuals would rather distance themselves to that person and only come back to their lives once everything is already settled.

 

Habits Of Emotionally Immature Teens (Youth Counseling)

Most teens are impulsive, and that is a fact. They often do things without thinking twice. They do not usually consider thinking about the consequences of their actions because they believe this “you only live once” motto in life. In some instances, they have this overconfidence about their supposed ability to picture out things and respond to them aggressively. But despite that belief, they still react with their emotions making them somewhat immature.

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Teens reacting to things through emotions are quite common. It explains how they treat themselves and those other things around them. Often, they find the whole experience confusing because of the decisions they have to take, and they also struggle with mental and emotional instability for longer periods. To figure out how these emotionally immature teens differ from others, here are some of the habits used as a guideline.

Being In Denial – Emotional immaturity often has something to do with being in denial. Teenagers believe that one way to get rid of their life issues is through running away from them. So they somehow push their limits only to find a distraction and do everything they can to avoid facing their fears and problems. In unfortunate instances, teens denying their feelings lead to serious mental health problems as they get prone to debilitating symptoms of anxiety and depression.

Hating One ’s Self – Teens who often hate themselves for not being good enough clearly represent emotional immaturity. They focus more on beating themselves up, even on small mistakes they make. There is a constant self-criticism that takes all their energy and emotional wellness. They lack focus on self-care and self-love because they often believe that those things are insufficient. They are often insecure and full of self-doubt, impacting their ability to learn and develop their skills.

Wanting Too Much Attention – Teenagers are often misinterpreted for their actions. However, one thing is somehow true about them, and that is their strong desire for attention. They have this mentality to be always at the center of everything because they believe that is the only way people will validate them. They want their needs to be a top priority because that is how they picture getting their self-worth. It is an emotional immaturity because there is a constant demand for time, effort, understanding, and attention.

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Holding Grudges – There is a bit of confusion between the statement of forgiveness towards someone and not entirely forgiving what they did. Teenagers often act repulsive to people that upset them. Despite being okay with forgiveness, some teens tend to hold grudges to punish those individuals who hurt them purposely. The true intention of this held grudge is to make others feel guilty since there’s still a reminder of the mistake. Unfortunately, this antic is a sign of emotional immaturity because there is no room for listening and understanding other people’s points of view.

Overreacting – Emotional immaturity is usually connected with impulsive reactions. Teens always allow their emotions to get the best of them. It is as if they are bound to do or say stuff they know they will regret but will still say or do it anyway. Teenagers often cannot deal with difficult situations as their level of understanding is not yet inclined with a constructive and calm manner. Teens struggle with frequent mood swings, short temper, rage, and agitation, especially when things do not go their way.

Blackmailing People – Teens are commonly good at using blackmailing strategies as a form of payback. It is a habit that relates to emotional and mental control with the concept of making other people feel guilty, afraid, or obligated. It is considered emotional immaturity as the dynamic ends with toxic relationships. That is because there is the goal of control and manipulation through methods like withdrawing affection, acting passive-aggressive, threatening to leave, or getting replaced by someone else.

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Blaming Others – Since most teenagers want to be in control all the time, they often execute a blaming game to avoid guilt and be at fault. Most of them do not take responsibility for their actions because they believe that what they do is reasonable at some point. Instead of being sorry, teens often justify their wrongdoings and point their fingers at everyone that could get involved. These teens lack self-awareness as they use blame games as a coping mechanism making them emotionally immature in all aspects.

Needing To Be Right – Anger and frustration are teenagers’ go-to emotional state. That is the most powerful coping tool that helps them get over stress and other negativity from uncontrolled things and people. Unfortunately, it is considered emotional immaturity because they use those emotions to insist on being right all the time. As a result, teens refuse to openly discuss their inappropriate behavior because they somehow feel like their opinions are being challenged.